I have finally reached my goal of having a “yeard” AKA a full year of beard growth. I’m really proud that I made it through but I must say that it has been pretty hard for me. As you already know from the title, I decided to shave it off, but I’ll start by saying what was positive about the experience and at the end I’ll talk about the reasons why I shaved it all. This post is some kind of a continuation to the one I made at about six months of growth, I’ll keep about the same structure but I’ll instead write my feelings of the moment, so I recommend that you read the two articles so it will make more sense.
Society’s pressure
As for the pressure, nothing really changed, I don’t look more “acceptable” to others at 6 months than at 12 months. In my friend and family circle, most people got used to it and nearly stopped talking about it, but it stayed the same for the rest of the population.
Hobo VS ordinary guy
In the past article I said that I didn’t look like a homeless guy but the more it grew the more I thought I looked like one, this thing was so curly that it was nearly impossible to make it look “clean” and well kept. And I don’t want to go to the barber shop every two weeks so I was doomed to look like something I don’t want to look like.
Guys VS girls
For the guys, everything stayed pretty much the same as it was at 6 months, most of them don’t care and some find it really nice.
<frustration>I see a lot of beard memes, and in my case at least, they’re all bulls**t, a beard doesn’t f**king attract any woman. I’ve been single for quite a while now and a beard didn’t help me finding my soul mate, if it has done something, it probably have driven it away from me.</frustration> Ok I had to say it, sorry. Seriously, it seems that it’s a turn off for most women, try it out and see for yourself (not that 3 days long beard, a real one). From what I’ve seen, if you want to have a beard and still be attractive, you’ve got to be blessed by nature (or maybe just old enough) for it to grow thick evenly all over your face and also have that natural charisma and self confidence that looks appealing on the opposite sex. And I’m obviously not there yet. I believe that the day we find true love it won’t matter how well or bad we look, but I really have no idea so lets keep hoping for it to be true.
Beyond the look
I think the greatest benefit I got from growing that beard was the self confidence I gained. The stare I got from people whenever I was in public and all their comments about shaving and looking good, it obviously made me less sensitive to other people’s hate and more confident about my own life choices. But at the same time it made me more aware of the importance of the image we project on others. I think that a man looks way more badass with a beard, even if the guy under it has nothing badass about him.
Drawing attention
It gets attention, whether you want it or not, you stand out of the crowd when you have a beard, and that feeling is awesome, it makes you feel like you’re “more” than other men, I bet some confidence comes from that feeling. It also feels great when someone tells you “hey nice beard” although it doesn’t happen has much as I thought it would.
Facing reality
I follow many beard pages on Facebook so I see many photos of guys at a six month growth who have a beard longer than mine after a full year without trimming. Some would say that we must not compare ourselves to others, while I agree with this, I feel more like I have to wait two times more than others for the same result, and with it being relatively hard on my morale, I don’t think it’s worth it anymore. I have a pretty strong neck beard but the cheek and mustache hair are visibly weaker than the rest, I’m not sure how it looks from the outside (from other people’s point of view) but I get annoyed by it whenever it get in front of a mirror. I feel like it’s not mature yet even though I’m nearly 28 years old. I guess I’ll wait some time and try again someday.
Shaving
The same paterns seem to repeat themselves as I remember when I was young and trying to grow longer hair because all skaters were doing it, after some time I just got tired and shaved everything. Now that I don’t care much about my hair anymore I feel the same thing about my beard and after a few months I feel an urge to shave it to none. I guess I’m just like these girls on Facebook that change their hair and post statuses about a new life beginning. Like I said earlier, I gained a lot of self confidence from growing this beard but I have come to a point where I feel like it’s draining all of my energy. They say men think about sex every 7 seconds, but for me this thought was replaced by the thought of shaving (ok maybe not completely…). You know when your computer suddenly starts lagging intensively and you find out that some process is taking 100% CPU time, in my brain that process was thoughts-of-shaving.exe. For the last two years I have been working on myself to live a simplier life and lately this beard was making me feel like everything was harder because of it, so f**k it I’ll just shave and start living again. If you’ve read my other articles you probably know that I keep talking about ways to make life more enjoyable, it was getting less enjoyable because of the beard so it had to go, just like if it was a bad relationship. I don’t just say things on this blog, I try to apply them as much as I can too ;).
The matter of the look after all
The more I get older, the more I seem to think that it’s important to show oulselves on our best side (while still being true to ourselves). It might seem a bit superficial, but I like beautiful girls, so why shouldn’t I look like what I expect of others? While I agree that inner beauty is as important as physical beauty (maybe more), when we see someone we don’t know (in person), we have to rely on physical apparence before we can get to know the inner one. And I’m pretty sure that most of us will be more interested in knowing someone deeply if the person in question is good looking externally. It was a personal challenge for me to grow a beard for a full year, once that the goal is met, I have to keep on going forward, and for me going forward required that I shaved.
Should you grow a beard?
I still think that men should try it at least once, there really is more to it than just hair on your face, it makes you see the world from a different eye. I say try it and see where it takes you, and if it doesn’t live up to the expectations, then shave and go on.
Final words
I still think that men look great with a beard, but I feel like I need to look “normal” for a while so I can keep on making progress in my life. And don’t forget, it’s not the beard on the outside that counts, it’s the beard on the inside.